**Life through a Teenage Periscope-_-We Are All Insane. We Simply Exist in Different Levels of Awareness and Denial
RandomBlakMan
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Name: Jonathan
State: California
Birthday: 9/30/1987
Gender: Male


Interests: Writing, Reading, Thinking, Loving. The things I'm good at, unfortunately... there seems to be no market for people with ideals...
Expertise: Hypnotizing people into reading my stuff.... See, I'm pretty good at it, huh?
Occupation: Retired
Industry: Nonprofit


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AIM: RandomBlakMan


Member Since: 4/29/2004

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Tuesday, May 24, 2005

Currently Playing
This Is the Dream of Evan and Chan
By Dntel
see related

In which we find the Hero

Painting

Crazy colorshuestints

filling the gaps

changing the times

doing nothing

 

Still he fights with stalwartbroken

ResolveDetermination

Still he rages

against a world

that doesn’t know his name

for a god,Who can’t recall

 

His face.


Sunday, April 24, 2005

Currently Playing
Either/Or
By Elliott Smith
Angeles
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Clasped in her enveloping arms, oblivion rushing behind her ears, I can see the inevitable coming towards me at lightning speed. Some call this death, but I’ve named it Love. The kind of love that breaks your innards and makes you puke the things you forgot you eat. This love tears you up inside and pushes itself through your eyes like tears. This love eats away at the tissue of your body one aching piece by piece, muscle by muscle, nerve by ridiculous nerve, until you are simply a slithering wraith with words of wondrous worth that mean nothing. Destruction roaring now, I sink into her warmth, digging under her skin, trying my hardest to become another, weaker part of this amazing construct of her. I’m lost in her beautiful being now, and in another second, I am gone.


Thursday, April 14, 2005

Currently Playing
Straylight Run
By Straylight Run
existentialism on prom night
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In two hours it will be the weekend. I'm excited.


Sunday, April 10, 2005

Currently Playing
Antics
By Interpol
Not Even Jail
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The world twists and turns and tosses itself against the realms of reality; can you not feel it convulse? This slow-motion madness, this bittersweet insanity, this unbearable veracity that kills me with its ever growing seduction, it beckons me deeper into the poisoned halls of death simplified. I can feel the smoky touch of the grave clawing within my blackening lungs, urging me on into the nothingness so desired, and finally I’ve found that oblivion my teenage angst has always craved. The small and pure white tone, so deceiving, I’ve found has taught me the true meaning of fear. Sinking in a void of induced confusion and anxiety forevermore, I’ve never lost myself so thoroughly than this. Touch the sky one last time; maybe we’ll all go down in time, but I’ll make sure that I am the first.


Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Currently Playing
Sunsets and Car Crashes
By Spill Canvas
The Tide
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I'm telling you, the world hates me.

            Sweaty, white and clammy palms gripped the metal railing, and we all waited for the end. Some were crying, some were praying, and still others stared with blank and disbelieving eyes at the doom that had befallen us all. I quickly grabbed my cap up from the floor and ran to where a group of officers were standing around on the deck, smoking their expensive cigarettes and laughing at some ridiculous quip. The first man who came in reach of my arms was quickly captured by my hands and turned around to face me. He was a taller man than I, of fair complexion; he had sandy blonde hair that escaped in tufts from underneath his officer’s cap, and blue eyes that shone with the deepest blasé apathy I had ever seen. A cigarette was pressed lightly between his lips, and smoke siphoned slowly out of the small part of his mouth. I shook the man violently.

“What in bloody hell are ya doing?” I yelled at him, “Can’t ya see the god damned ship is ‘bout to be wrecked?”

He stared for a moment, and then gave me a slight smirk, replying, “Well, of course the ship is going to wreck. What’s your point?”

Confusion and anger flooded my brain, so I shook him again.

“Aren’t ya boys goin’ to do somethin, I mean, for god sakes, ya all are the commanders o’ this vessel, aintcha?        

“That we are. Tell me, good sir, what is it exactly that you expect from us? This doom is inescapable, as you can see. Our radio is dead, and even if it weren’t help is not always guaranteed. Our life boats were destroyed by poor maintenance in this ships younger day, so there is no hope for saving even a few,” he replied in the same cynical tone as before. “Unless you plan on flying off of this ship, there is no hope; consign yourself now to death and make joy of your remaining time, for what else is there? So if you’re not going to join me in a smoke, let off immediately and leave me be,” he said, shaking my loose hands off his jacket and promptly turning back to his comrades.

            I thought about attacking this man out of thoughtless rage, but before my hand could be raised, the icy and indifferent ocean came down upon my head, and I was no more.



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